An Open Invitation

September 26, 2009, BuddyDank and I will be getting married in Ames, Iowa.

Yes, that is just over three months away, so I thought it would be a good idea to get this up sooner rather than later.

You are all invited. If anyone wants to make the trip down (or up?) for the wedding, email me (joanne1111@gmail.com) or Buddy (buddy@buddydank.com) or leave a comment and let us know.

General plan is this...

Friday night is the satellite. We will be going out as a group to party / have fun / whatever. Saturday is the actual Main Event, but at a nice respectable (gives-you-time-to-cure-your-hangover-and-get-ready-for-another-one) 4:00pm. Watch NumbBono give Joanada away. See if Buddy goes all in or folds.

Reception at 5:00 in the same location as the ceremony. See, no travel time. No 5-hour ceremony in Latin or any other obscure language. Considerate, eh? We thought so. Fun and games will ensue. Yes, there will be a web broadcast. There will be singing. (With the exception of the bride - you can thank me in advance.) There will be drinking and debauchery, but only after the grandparents have left the building.

I already have confirmation from several bloggers who are going to be attending, so if you are at all able to, please consider coming as we would love to see you there!

I heard a rumor...

...that BuddyDank asked someone to marry him.

Rumor also has it that she said YES!

Leaving Las Vegas...Again

I’m cruising at 35000 feet somewhere over Colorado after a three-hour layover in Denver, and all I can think about is how much I wish I was heading back the other way.

Six days and five nights sounds like it should be a long enough trip, but it wasn’t. Though Vegas can wear you out after just a few days, I’d love to have more time to do some of the more “touristy” things that always seem to get pushed aside on trips like this. I havent seen the Bellagio fountains in about 3 years, I’ve never seen the Treasure Island show, and there are still a good number of attractions, hotels and casinos that I promise I will go visit but never seem to get around to.

That said, I wouldn’t trade a moment of the trip, except for the obvious regret of not being able to talk to everyone as much as I’d like.

So then, on to the synopsis. I left my house in Calgary on Wednesday at the ungodly hour of 5am so I could catch my flight to Denver. A three hour layover there was made tolerable due to the best little smoking lounge in the continental US. A few Bloody Mary’s, free wifi, and hitting up my IIF’s on chat helped pass the time. Finally it was time to board and I was officially en route to Vegas, baby!

I arrived in town at about 4:00, and BuddyDank and I headed to the Imperial Palace where we planned to broadcast the Mookie live. We checked into the hotel without incident and managed to get the internet set up in fairly short order. A quick trip to the store downstairs and we were set up with beer and tequila – everything needed to do a proper Mookie broadcast. Many shots were had, and after busting out of the Mook we headed downstairs to do a little gambling. This part of the story you can read here because I am too lazy to type it all out, but needless to say that first night couldn't have been much better.

The Bloggers

What can I say that hasnt already been said about this eclectic group of people. I got to see all my old friends and met a bunch that I have been waiting for months or even years to finally see live and in person, and as always not one person wasn’t as awesome as I hoped they’d be. It would take far too long (and would require too many brain cells that I killed over the past week) to name everyone, but it was great meeting Bayne, Recess, Pirate Lawyer, Muhctim, Peaker, Joshua Carlson, Yestbay, Emptyman, and all the others for the first time. (Sorry to all those I left out, seriously brain dead right now.)

Highlights

HOT HOT PENNY: Most positive EV (–EV) game in da house, at least when I was sitting there. Well, that and The Big Event

Spending a relaxing night at the Strat with Buddy and Mr. & Mrs. Emptyman – enjoying a little downtime between all the chaos

Watching Corner Gas and Bob & Doug’s 2-4. I didnt think they could get funnier. I was wrong.

Lazing in bed with Katitude for an afternoon when she came to visit and hang out with me. Add room service and a whole lotta girly talk, and it was a great way to relax and recover for a few hours.

Seeing Sweet Sweet Pablo and Gracie as newlyweds – huge congrats again!

Getting a room that wasnt in the North Forty, had hot water everytime I showered, and was right by the elevator and ice machine

Steelers taking it down!

Every slot machine I touch turns to gold

Having not one, not two, not three, but FOUR beer bitches at my disposal. You guys rock.

Not getting stabbed/killed/attacked/robbed when I was approached by two very drunk guys beside a Chinese Massage Parlor when I took a wrong turn alone down a very dark, barren street.

DQB four times in two hours on video poker, plus countless other times throughout the trip

And I’m sure it goes without saying, being able to hang out in Vegas for six days with my partner in crime, BD.

~~~~~~~~~~~~

Right now it is hard to feel anything except excessive sadness. It gets harder and harder to leave every time, but I wouldn’t change it for the world. I should be landing in about 45 minutes, and have nothing but -25 degree temperatures (and a car that probably won’t start) to look forward to. On the plus side, my cats are probably going to be thrilled that I have finally found my way home, and I have missed them too. I’m back to work Tuesday morning, but fortunately only for a week as I get two full weeks off over Christmas. Hmmm.....thinking Vegas again for New Years would be a good idea! Who is in?

Thanks

So I had every intention of writing a recap of Okie Vegas tonight, but something kept stopping me. I had to dig really deep (and I am really not that deep) only to realize that no matter what I say, no matter which words I choose to describe it - you aren't going to get the true essence of what it is like to actually be there.

How can I describe what it is like to finally meet Surflexus? He is genuinely one of the nicest people you will ever have the pleasure of meeting. He and I go back years and years, and I know his game better than almost anyone's. I was taken aback by his skill at the final table of the tournament, and felt privileged just to be among the top four standing.

Then there is 23Skidoo, who I have known for almost as long yet never met live either. We have had many moments - but there is nothing quite like finally looking your friend in the eye, putting a face to the name, and finally getting that hug that has been coming for way too long.

Maudie deserves her own special section. She was the very first blogger I ever met, way back in 2005, and I love her to death. People are wrong when they say that Ozzie's is Oklahoma's best kept secret - it is this woman.

I am not a vain person, but there is something to be said about waking up on the couch (with no hair done, no makeup, in your PJ's) feeling very insecure, yet surrounded by bloggers who really couldn't give a shit what you looked like, just happy that you were there.

There are those who show up not wanting to leave anyone behind. They have presents or bounties for anyone who happened to make it, regardless of how well they knew that person.

There is also something to be said about someone who has been your wingman (woman) for the past 3 years and forgives all that you may do, causes shit of her own, and carries on without the blink of an eye or the handicap of a very sore ankle.

There are very few people who can take the kind of abuse I deal out at the poker table gracefully, catching exactly what I needed to at the right time, regardless of how donkey my play was...and still give me a hug and not hate me for it afterwards.

There are even less people who can be so humble to not even realize that their little corner of the world is something not only to embrace, but to emulate, and the fact that they are willing to share it with the world (our world) is a true gift to the rest of us.

I don't know many people who can listen to months and months of me spewing on and on about my skill at Guitar Hero, then not only Pwning me at the game, but letting me believe that I really wasn't that far behind. Further to that, I know even less who will sit there and keep me company for hours as I debate about taking a cat named Yoda across International borders, just because I quite simply can't let her go.

Even more rare are the people that you just simply love on sight. He told me to call him Beer Bitch, and though hesitant at first, I quickly warmed up to the title as I realized I didn't have to lift an un-manicured nail to get Any. Damn. Thing. I. Wanted. You had my back, Turd Chaser, and I will forever have yours.

How is it possible to let the rest of the world know that when Double-D sings, there is an angel in heaven who wipes her brow and says "Whew - I have the day off - my work here is done"

How do you describe reading the absolute insanity that is someone's day to day life, knowing there is no possible way to relate, and just hope that you can have a somewhat intelligent conversation with this person, only to find out that he is just as cool and awesome as anyone else in the room?

I am humbled.

I am grateful.

I am in awe.

I am appreciative.

I never knew that I had friends like you, and I am thankful, more than I can express on here, and more than you will ever know. You all rock.

Okie Caviar Is Pure Gold

It was nothing more than a passing comment, but the single most profound statement I heard all weekend was "I'm here to meet my friends." Amidst all the hilarity, the debauchery, and the activity, for a few short moments I sank into a shell of thought and contemplated those words.

There was a time not long ago when we were all imaginary to each other. Nothing more than an avatar on a screen and an assumed personality based solely on what we decided to type into a little chat box that day. Somehow from there we gained familiarity with each other, and camaraderie followed in turn. Friendships developed and relationships formed. Still though, it was all on paper - or more accurately, all on screen.

In what still strikes me as an almost inconceivable notion, as a group we began traveling to meet up with each other across various parts of the continent. Meeting in casinos and hotels, staying in each others homes. Sometimes making upwards of three or four trips a year to see each other. Following each other's lives by what we write in our blogs, sometimes knowing more intimate details about each other than we do our own families or neighbors.

This past weekend I found myself lazing in the sun on the bank of a river in the middle of a country other than my own, surrounded by people who, through any other circumstance or possible reality, I never could have known. There is no conceivable scenario that should have brought a Western Canadian to the middle of Oklahoma State to meet up with twenty or so people from all corners of the continent in the middle of July, but through a fortunate twist of fate it really did happen and I couldn't be more thankful.

It's true what they say - you had to be there, and rather than try to recapture everything that was said and done or places we went and the food we ate, I'm simply going to limit my summary to a few quick words about our host for now, and follow up in a few days with some highlighted moments that have stuck out in my mind. I assure each and every one of you though that I have hundreds more memories of you all (y'all) that I will be carrying around with me for a very long time.

On that note - Gary Darlin - what can I say that hasn't already been said about you? Thank you so much for not only letting us into your home but also into your life and allowing us to share it with you. Everything about your home, your lake, your kids, your wife, your friends, and even your pets is pure gold - just like you. (And please tell Mrs. GCox that I already have a batch of Okie Caviar made in my fridge!)

All I have to say is....

This now belongs to me.

Okie Vegas, here I come. I land in 40 hours!!!!!

Just try and keep me outta your country bitches!

Insanity Ensues

I am beginning to think that I really am a sucker for punishment.

As anyone who reads me will know, my daughter's friend moved in with us a little while ago. It was originally only supposed to be until the end of the summer, but I'm fairly certain we are keeping her for good now. In my mind she is part of the family now anyways.

Two daugthers I can deal with.

Then there is the friend who lives up the street. She is over almost every night, and in turn has taken up semi-permanent residence on our couch.

Fine. Two daugthers and a friend, I can deal with.

About a week ago, my daughter asked if her two friends (who live 3 hours North of here) could come stay with us on Saturday, meaning today. I didn't even really think about it, just agreed, figuring it would be for the weekend. These guys do that all the time, travel between the two cities and hang out at each other's houses for a few days at a time.

Well imagine my surprise then when I returned from driving daughter #2 to work this morning, to find some unknown parents in a minivan unloading suitcases full of stuff onto our driveway. Yes, the girls had arrived, and are staying for 10 days. TEN. Lord help me. Yes, my daugther neglected to pass on that little detail to me.

That brings the house count to six females plus two cats (yes, they are both female too) so I'm already on estrogen overload. Be warned, if you are a male friend of mine, chances are I will be hitting you up on chat a little more than usual throughout this duration as I have a feeling I'll be seeking out a testosterone fix or two here soon.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Update on the new job: it is fabulous. I am thoroughly enjoying it, feel very comfortable there, and am really happy that I made the decision to go back to a structured schedule. Yes, I'm still working 7 days a week, and havent had a day off since May 23rd, BUT - believe it or not - I actually have two days off next week, two days off next weekend, and then five days off for Okie the week after. Wow - talk about a slacker, eh? I don't know how I mananged to get so many days off, but they are very much needed, I assure you.

So other than the Okie trip, what am I going to do with my four whole days off? I'd love to say that I am going to be off doing something fabulous, but the truth is I will be doing nothing more than cleaning my house. It has been seriously neglected since I've been working so much, and it is high time to do something about it. The girls do the day-to-day stuff like dishes and vacuuming, but I still have boxes that need sorting, furniture that needs placing, things that need painting, etc., etc. Rather than dreading it though, I am actually looking forward to getting everything in order, so that is a good thing I suppose.

Sadly though, today is not one of those days that I have off, so I'm on my way in to work now. Hope everyone is having a great weekend!

13 days...but who's counting?

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, which is good because I am too tired to type:











No, I don't have my passport yet. Yes, I will have it in time.

Really.

Well, I am at least 99.5% sure. (Have to leave just a smidgen of room for err)

Just. Can't. Wait.

I've got nothing

I really don't have much to say today since I just woke up, but thought it was high time I put something on here again.

I rarely post about poker, and even more rarely post screen shots, but this one made me laugh:


Nothing like folding a flopped boat-turned-DQB. That was in the Friday night donkament last night, which I bubbled out of in 4th place.

/pokercontent

I'm moving pretty slowly today as I had a few too many of these last night

while chatting with the IIF's via this:

and this:

Typing in a chat box is sooooo 2004.

The next few weeks are going to be pretty busy for me as I don't have a day off until July 1st (Canada Day) and am frantically running around trying to finalize my plans to go here:



It's going to be tight, but I am still 99% sure that I will be in attendance. I'd like to say that I was 100% sure, but there is still a tiny, tiny chance that I won't be able to pull everything together in time. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

I'm off to work (seriously, what kind of sick person chooses to work Saturdays?) but I hope everyone is having a great weekend!

Zero to Sixteen in Twenty-Four Hours

While you were all sleeping...

I spawned another child. She weighs in at about 100 lbs, is approximately 5'4", and somehow miraculously just celebrated her sixteenth birthday.

Her first words were: "God, Rime of the Ancient Mariner Rocks"

Pink cigars and bottles of tequila are encouraged.

Thirty-Eight Hours of Bliss

I have an entire day off Saturday.

That may not sound like much to most, but since I haven't had a single day off in over two months (literally) it is absolutely golden to me. Add in this evening and the hours before I have to be back at work Sunday, and you get a total of thirty-eight hours of non-committed time.

Heaven.

Of course, I have a lot of work to do, and probably will end up doing it during that time anyways, but that is something I am not going to think about right now.

So I started the new job this week. It was pretty surreal, considering I found myself back in a cubicle which I swore I would never do again. Even more strange was that I really quite liked it. There are about a million people who work there (very large Architectural Design firm) and enough work to keep me very busy for a long time to come. They are still somewhat defining my long-term role within the company, but for now I am filling the position of Project Administrator. In a nutshell, I push a lot of paper, balance a lot of numbers, edit a lot of documents, and will be attending a lot of meetings.

My only regret right now, especially since I seem to be working for such a forward-thinking company that bases their business on inspiration from the product (architectural design) and the people who work there (and their vision) I'm wishing I was in more of a creative role. I'm somewhat of an artist, somewhat of a writer, and very much a dreamer, and I'd love to be able to incorporate that into what I do day-to-day. My educational background is actually in marketing and advertising, but detail is my thing and that is what this job requires in spades.

Time will tell.

Anyways, I was taken out for lunch earlier this week by the boss from my (now-ending) contract position, and we went to this absolutely fabulous restaurant. Days later I am still dreaming of how good the food was.

Appetizer:

Handmade Gnocchi with Black Truffles and Herbs, served with a side of Parmesan Foam

Entree: Roasted Salmon on top of a Whipped Potato base, with green beans, served with a Saffron & Pancetta Beurre Blanc

Good lord it was amazing. We had two bottles of sparkling water during, finished with lattes, and the total bill was $92 before tip.

~~~~~~~~~~

So I wrote the above last night but apparently forgot to hit publish post, and it is now Saturday morning. Sadly I did wake up at 6am, which was kind of surprising since I was kept up way too late last night by a few highly entertaining people (no fault of my own, of course) but managed to laze around in bed for a few delicious hours before hitting Kat up on the IM.

Her and I made some coffee and played a few token tourneys, had a several-hour-long voice chat (joined eventually by OhCaptain and his hilarious girls) and now I'm off to actually get something done today. My list is long and full of things that are so very not fun, but unfortunately laundry happens and the kitchen doesn't clean itself.

How is it that I can be friends with some of the biggest self-professed geeks in the world, yet none of them have come up with ways to make my house self-cleaning? Sheesh - get on it, guys.

Don't Fall Off Your Chair

Two posts in two days? WTF is up with that, eh?

Me, to my friend today:

Hey guess what? I got another job

Her, to me:

Are you fucking insane?

Yes, that does bring the job count up to six now.

Now granted, one of them ends in two weeks as this new one begins, so really it is still only five. However, the latest one was a little unexpected. I was originally recommended to the new company (which is a major architectural design firm) by a current co-worker, as they needed someone to do contract administration a few days per week for a definitive amount of time. Since it worked well with everything else I had on the go, I agreed to do it and was hired yesterday sight-unseen at a very nice rate of pay.

Today I went in on my lunch hour to complete the required paperwork and meet with them for the first time, and before I left they had convinced me to join the firm as a full time employee. Actually, the exact words of the Project Manager were: "There is no way you are NOT going to work here full time." Nice little boost to the ego, if I do say so myself.

Since my skill set just happens to mesh perfectly with what they currently are in dire need of, we tossed around numbers and finally settled on a figure that admittedly is more than what I expected, and certainly pleases me to no end. The job itself isn't rocket science, but it does require someone with a diversified background that I just happen to have, and in fact, they are kind of creating the position around what I am able to do for them. Since I'm able to cover a bunch of areas, the job itself should stay pretty interesting for a long time to come.

I haven't really made a decision on what I am going to do about the other jobs yet, though obviously I am going to have to scale them all back a bit. Right now I work about 65-70 hours a week between the five jobs, almost always seven days a week. I haven't even begun to reach the point of burnout, but I know that will eventually happen.

The thing is, I can't stand having idle time these days. I have to throw myself into 101 things at any given moment or I go stir crazy. Funny really, since I am by nature the laziest person I know. I can't be bothered with doing "things for me" like shopping (HATE shopping), going to the spa (no interest whatsoever) or the like. My "down time" is when I am actually playing poker with all of you or chatting it up on the radio, but even then I am usually doing a few things on the side. I do have an unnatural obsession with Guitar Hero though, and when I have a few hours with nothing else going on, that is usually what I can be found doing.

Anyways, everything will eventually fall into place. I'm not starting the new schedule for a few weeks, so that leaves me with a little time to figure the rest of it out. In the meantime though, I am so excited I can barely sit still!

Spawn and Speck

Mother's Day came a few days late for me this year, as several of my nine thousand jobs prevented me from being able to celebrate on Sunday. My daughter actually sent me a text message asking if we could arrange to go out for dinner one night this week, so I replied sure, are you paying? She said yeah, as long as I can borrow some money. Needless to say, I got stuck with the bill.

It was worth every penny though, as we went to my favorite restaurant. Her friend tagged along (it was supposed to be three of them all together, but her other friend bailed at the last minute) and as you can see, they dressed up for the occasion:
Yes, those are both Iron Maiden shirts. Would you expect anything less from a child I spawned?

Dinner itself was wonderful though. The restaurant we went to is actually owned by a friend of mine, though sadly I haven't seen him in over a decade. My daughter has met him on a few of her frequent visits there without me, but he always seems to be missing in action when I show up.

We decided to just share a bunch of food, and started the meal with some mixed greens drizzled with a house-made red wine vinaigrette. Following that we had the calamari, which they prepare by crisping to perfection before lightly tossing in a spicy lemon tomato sauce. Our third dish was the Fungi Fritti, which is battered oyster mushrooms topped with a gorgonzola cream sauce. Absolutely incredible.

Now, the thing that makes this restaurant so incredible is that they are one of the few Italian restaurants in the world (outside of Italy) that belong to the Verace Pizza Napoletana Association, a Naples-based group that ensures all ingredients, preparation, and equipment passes their strict guidelines. To give you an indication of what I mean by strict, their massive wood burning oven contains stones straight from Mount Vesuvius - a requirement by the organization.

I don't know how much difference the actual stones make, but the pizza is incredible. Now you have to understand, we are talking about authentic Napoli pizza here - this isn't Dominos. If you like your pizza loaded with toppings and weighed down with two pounds of cheese, this isn't for you. The crust is soft, and just lightly charred (not burnt) on the botttom, resulting in an insanely delicious flavor. The sauce is nothing more than crushed San Marzano tomatoes. You will not find Hawaiian Pizza on their menu - the toppings are all authentic as well. My favorite is the Speck, which is tomato sauce, mozzarella, speck (smoked prosciutto), parmigiano, and basil:


Just trust me, it is amazing. Anyways, we wrapped up our dinner with an order of Tiramisu split three ways, which took all of about 92 seconds for us to demolish. One drink for me and Italian soda for the girls, and the total damage was $90 (including a 20% tip) for the three of us.

The food alone was worth every penny, but since my daughter and I get to spend very little actual quality time together these days due to both of our insane schedules, it was the company that made the evening priceless.

Perspective

This is a story about Nick.

Nick was born 11 days before me, in the same year. I've since found out that he and I were born in the same hospital, and his family moved to Calgary at about the same time as mine did. I've also found out that he and I shared a number of friends over the years, yet we never actually crossed paths that I am aware of. More about him in a minute though.

Twelve years ago this month, one of my very best friends committed suicide. I've written about this before, so for now I'll just say that even though I went to the church portion of her funeral, I never attended the grave-side services. It was months before I was finally able to bring myself to go visit and try to make peace with her passing, but since I didn't know where she was buried, I was resigned to spend the entire day walking around looking for her grave.

If you've ever walked around an entire cemetery, you will know there are little things you learn along the way. The older sections are very grey - there are very few visitors and an ominous feeling hangs in the air. Not twenty feet away, where the more recently departed rest, there is a kaleidoscope of colors, most graves decorated in flowers or ornaments or small tokens in honor of their memory. There is also a lot of dirt, as the grass hasn't always had time to grow yet. Needless to say, within a few short hours and with very muddy shoes, I narrowed down where her plot would be, and finally came face-to-face with the reality of her death. I sat beside her tombstone and talked to her for quite a long time. I had to make peace with her for choosing to leave us all, and though I had never felt anger over her death, after that day I was able to not quite feel as helpless in dealing with it. When I stood up to leave though, something caught the corner of my eye. It was a gleaming white headstone, about four feet tall, and the way the sun caught it I was compelled to go take a closer look.

This is where I met Nick.

As soon as I read his name on the marble, I felt an unbelievable connection. It was as though I had known him my entire life, and I could almost visualize actual memories of him, helped by the fact that there was a picture of him embedded in the marble. He passed away just before his twentieth birthday, ironically in the same month that I had conceived my daughter. His life was ending, and I was bringing new life into the world. I spent a good two hours there trying to make sense of why I felt such a powerful connection to him, but finally wrote it off as having spent too much time around sadness that day and that my imagination was just working overtime.

Over the years though, every time I went to visit Janet, I was compelled to visit Nick as well. I no longer felt as though I was visiting the grave of a stranger, but rather someone that I had once known. I felt as though I was there to mourn his death as well as that of my own friend. Years later, with the help of old newspapers and the internet, I did some research and found out the coincidences about our birthplaces, about our mutual friends, and everything else.

Yesterday, Kat and I were talking about cemeteries, and I was telling her the story about Nick. Today, I was out of the house and all of a sudden knew that I had to go visit again - it had been far too long.

As I pulled into the cemetery, there was a small, old, Asian man walking very slowly, as though in pain, holding a wrapped bouquet of flowers. It was obvious that he still had a long way to go as the graves don't start for quite a distance, plus from experience in walking around the cemetery I know where the predominantly-Chinese section is located and it was far. I pulled over and asked him if he would like a ride, and though he spoke very little English, he climbed into my car and pointed to direct me where to go. Now I'm not really in the habit of picking up strangers and letting them into my vehicle, but under the circumstances, there was no way I would consider doing otherwise.

When we reached the area he wanted, he turned to me and gave me a sad little smile. He reached out and squeezed my hand in thanks, and exited my car. I watched him for a few moments as he made his way through one of the greyer areas of the graveyard, and I could only imagine that his wife had passed away many years before, and that he still made his way out here once a week to bring her flowers. Hers was the only grave that still had color on it for miles.

After making my way back, I stopped by Janet's grave first. I felt terrible that one of my best friend's final resting place is a mere 40 blocks from my house and I haven't stopped by in years. I spent a considerable amount of time at her plot, silently going over everything that I wished I could say to her, filling her in on everything she has missed, and once again making my peace with her untimely death.

Afterwards, I made my way over to Nick. I spent some time there, thinking about this person who I never met, yet had touched me in such a profound way. I had always thought, with every part of my soul, that he and I were destined to meet, yet we didn't. Was it because death took him before that could happen, or was it because we missed out on the opportunity while he was alive - that is what I didn't know and had always dwelled on. It may sound silly, but I honestly believed there was a portion of my life that he should have been a part of - no matter how big or how small.

I was wrong though. I was never really able to put my finger on it until today, and though I still don't have it all figured out, there is some semblance of reason in my mind now. The thought I couldn't shake today, as I sat in front of his grave, was about all the people that I have met through the strangest of circumstance. Since the inception of this blog, I have met over a hundred people in real life who I never possibly could have crossed paths with otherwise. With that comes hundreds of memories to draw upon. Factor in the chats, the games, and the late night phone conversations, and I now have thousands upon thousands of memories that wouldn't have been there had I not taken the time to start this, or gathered up the nerve to make that first trip to Vegas.

For the past twelve years, I had been trying to figure out what Nick represented to me, and I finally realized today that I had it backwards. It was not what he represented to me, it was how I perceived what I represented to him. I had the chance to live my life still. I had the chance to not miss out on opportunity. I had the chance to go out and meet people and experience new things. Looking at Nick, I was looking at myself, and was reminded that I was still able to go out and grasp every opportunity possible. To me, he represents all the people that I actually HAVE met through strange circumstance, that never expected to and really never should have, had my life played out any different.

I've vowed to myself to take whatever chances life presents to me, because I don't want to look back in twenty or thirty or forty years time and have any regrets. I don't want to miss out on any opportunities. I don't want to miss out on meeting those people who have, and will continue to enhance my life.

I want to be able to go visit Nick, and let him live vicariously through me.

Canada Sucks

Highlights of my day so far, and it is only 9am:

- Took me over two and a half hours to drive into work this morning - usually takes 20 min

- Snowflakes are the size of baseballs (no exaggeration)

- I can't see out the window of my office due to a complete and total white-out

- My car has been sitting outside for 10 minutes, and it is completely buried already

- When I stepped out of said car this morning, the snow was up to my calves and the ground underneath was so slippery I wiped out and cracked my head. Bruises are forming as we speak.

Living in Canada sucks.